I feel like a fisherman’s wife some days. Always screaming like a banshee at the boys to BE CAREFUL. But lordy I am wasting my breath. They pay absolutely no attention to me. None! They keep on yelling and running/wrestling/spinning/generally being rowdy. Of all the totally useless things I say to my kids ‘Be careful’ must be top of the list. What does ‘be careful’ even mean? Clearly my boys don’t know or don’t care! They blatantly ignore me. It’s like they think they are invincible, with a total disregard for their own safety.
The only possible explanation for my insistent pleadings with the boys to ‘be careful’ is that it gives me some weird illusion that I have an ounce of control. I don’t. Once that manic play starts there really is no stopping them. Short of discreetly sneaking a a packet of chips from the cupboard. Or attempting to go to the toilet. Strangely I never think of that among the chaos of their fighting games. I’m on high alert because someone will get hurt and I really, really want them to BE CAREFUL!
Other totally useless things I say to my kids
I’m trying to come up with something remotely effective to yell at tell the boys when they are rolling around on the floor like a litter of enthusiastic puppies. It hasn’t worked! Instead I screech these things on high rotation:
- Stop Yelling! Doesn’t work, especially when yelled at them.
- Slow down. Resulting in faster running to escape cranky Mum.
- Please be a little quieter. Well they are so loud I doubt they even hear me. Three little boys are capable of making an insane amount of noise.
- Be gentle with your brother. Pffft, ‘gentle’ is clearly not part of the game.
- Why are you so loud? Umm, because they are small boys x3!
- Why did you do that? Come on Mum, you know that one is pointless.
- Stop wrestling! It’s like banging my head against a brick wall.
- Someone will get hurt. And they do, and I bite my tongue and resist saying “I told you so”.
- Listen to me! No way, crazy eyed lady.
- Wine, where’s the wine? Oh wait, that’s what I say to my husband!
You get the picture. It’s like I am talking to myself! That’s a few of the totally useless things I say to my kids when they are causing a ruckus. I’m sure there are more. What’s the most useless thing you tell your kids?
Linking up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT
Yup. Four of mine are boys. They totally never hear anything. Their dad doesn’t either. It’s a male thing.
Oh no Jody, I was certain their hearing would improve with age!
Haha! I can so relate to this, mine don’t listen to a damn thing I say either! ‘It’s not a race!’ is the one I find falls on deaf ears the most lately. Apparently EVERYTHING is a race these days. Sigh. #TeamIBOT
It’s not a race gets used here too, especially in reference to eating! Oh, and life is a race, obviously Haidee!
Oh yes, this is totally our house too. Stop jumping, stop running, stop yelling, I quite often end up screeching just ‘stop’. Works for about one second before they start again.
And you’re much nicer than me, I can never resist ‘and this is why we keep our hands and feet to ourselves/don’t run/jump off the table/don’t play silly games’ etc etc. Is it effective? Not at all. Does it make me feel better? Absolutely 😝
Oh yes, sometimes I try STOP loudly too. Makes no difference! Glad your version of “I told you so” gives you some comfort xx
BAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA! Stop yelling and calm down are my favourites. (Go and brush your teeth comes in a distant third) Really. What am I thinking?!
Oh yeah, calm down is really effective! When I am cross and someone tells me to calm down it always turns out really well.
I often yell… Stop yelling.. A little wrong really
You’re not the only one!
People look at me like I have grown a second head when I say that I don’t want another child because my son makes enough noise for a whole tribe. Then they spend some time with him lol!
It’s not until you have noisy kids that you really understand the saying ‘silence is golden’!
Have you ever noticed too that ‘Be careful; is always said after they’ve hurt themselves? Almost like we expect them to go back in time and not do whatever it is that they did! We do say funny things sometimes. 🙂
Honestly Jess, I’d be better off to say nothing at all!
‘Why are you so loud?’ cracked me up! I need to stop asking ‘What you are doing?’ because the response is always just, bizarre.
Predictably ‘what are you doing?’ never gets an honest answer here!
Hahah I have girls. And one is a baby. And I’m still yelling these things daily! :/
Glad to hear I am not alone!
Hi Claire! As mum to Miss 3 there are certainly some things I’m wasting my time saying to her – she also seems to be determined to do the exact opposite of what I’ve said!
Kids have a knack for that, don’t they?!?
Come here NOW! and show me what you are looking at on the iPad …. followed by WHY AREN’T YOU HERE because of course they are getting whatever they were looking at off the screen and hoping the screaming fishmonger that is their mother might disappear before they actually appear.
You are NEVER eating food or DRINKING in the toy room again (because I have yet again picked up their dishes/glasses/empty food wrappers) – you know until the next time that I just want some peace and quiet and I want the lounge room to myself!
I am a yeller and I truly hate myself for yelling. I am the most inconsistent parent honestly today I happily let them do whatever they wanted (well that could be because I had a migraine and accidentally fell asleep for nearly 2hrs so the girls – nearly 11yr old twins could have done anything, I was in the house so therefore they are safe right?) But tomorrow I will be hopefully feeling better so they won’t get away with anything … Hmmmm there’s that saying pick your battles right? I often find that my three are so much better when there is only two home and it doesn’t matter which 2 it is the 3rd that always causes the problem …
Thank goodness someone else said what I have been thinking!
You’re more than welcome Kate! I often think I’d be better off to say nothing at all.
I ask ‘why did you do that?!’ every single day. I should know by now I will never get a reasonable response!
I’m pretty sure when kids are involved there’s never a reasonable response to that question!
I hear you. I hate saying “stop yelling” while I say it at the top of my voice. Makes me cringe the second after I say it.
Yep, there’s nothing like a bit of hypocritical parenting! I do it to Cam xx
Bahaha! All so true! I also find myself asking, “did you forget to turn your ears on today?”, and “calm down!”
Did you forget to turn your ears on! That’s classic, can’t say I have ever used that one. But If I did I imagine the response would be ‘you can’t turn your ears on, they are always on’!
“Stop yelling!” While yelling, very popular here. I have tried saying it quietly but no one heard me.
“You’re going to get hurt.” Is the other one but that’s almost always followed with child crying in pain.
Some days I feel like anything I say to them is totally pointless.
Yep Melinda, ‘stop yelling’ while yelling sends a mixed message!